" Here ’s the thing people do n’t get about us … "
Recently, IaskedAmericans in theBuzzFeed Communitywho live in conservative states but don’t agree with conservative politics to share things about their lives that people in liberal areas might not know or understand. In response, people shared their challenges and their fears, and some also shared their hopes for a better future. Here’s what people had to say:
1.“We’re raising a trans child in a state that recently passed legislation barring gender-affirming health care for minors. When our kid progressed from blockers to hormones, the prescription was denied by the national pharmacy chain. We had to get extra documentation from multiple doctors, petition the corporate office for the pharmacy, and jump through a million hoops to prove our child was ‘grandfathered’ and could receive the necessary medical care recommended by their pediatrician and endocrinologist.”
2.“I do policy work in Kansas and Missouri, and it’s actually refreshing to be a progressive in a red state. There’s a certain amount of strategic action and practicality that you can take to build coalitions that focus on policy, not politics. For example, we killed a bill that would’ve made it harder to adopt citizen-led ballot initiatives by playing conservatives off one another in the Missouri Senate. Guess what? That means it’ll be easier for us to adopt initiatives that’ll be on the ballot this year: overturning the abortion ban, increasing the minimum wage, and ensuring at least one week of guaranteed paid family and medical leave.”
" frankly , I feel like more blue - state common people would profit from a stretch out in the cerise states . It ’s a undecomposed admonisher of why we fight for the things we do . citizenry are driven more by how you’re able to avail them rather than who can be ache . Hope ALWAYS sells well . Fear is just a temporary sugar rush . occur conjoin us as we build ability out here ! "
— Nate , Missouri
3.“I hate it so much. I recently moved from Atlanta to Florida for employment purposes, and I regret it at least once a month. I went from being very politically involved (even considered running for local politics) to forgetting to vote for the first time in my adult life. It sucks knowing that no matter what you do, those around you are going to vote in ways that oppress you and your family.”
" To make matter worse , I ’m a minority in a very white area . My Logos never encountered racialism until we make a motion here , and he ’s in all probability going to have to go back to therapy to come through this country . I ’m hesitant to make booster with clean masses here because I always question what they ' really ' think about me as a opprobrious charwoman . "
— Carmen , Florida
4.“I’m a queer disabled cis woman who lives in Missouri, where the state government has been almost 100% right-wing for 20 years. I’m terrified for SO many things right now. One is the well-being of myself and many of my loved ones because of all of the super oppressive policies that have been pushed in our state legislature in the last several years.”
5.“I am a gay Mexican man who was born and raised in Southern California. I moved to Great Bend, Kansas, two weeks before my 26th birthday. I am now 39, living in Wichita, Kansas. White men have no problem calling me all the racial and homophobic slurs out loud to my face. I’ve been told to ‘go back to my country’ when I don’t speak Spanish and have never left the country, even for a vacation. I am fourth generation Mexican.”
— alexchris95
6.“I live in Kentucky. Here’s the thing people don’t get about us: one-quarter of the state’s population lives in just two cities: Louisville and Lexington. Both cities are heavily blue-leaning. The problem is that our state legislature has a Republican supermajority and keeps gerrymandering our districts so that the only blue district is the one that Louisville is in. Our only saving grace is that our governor is a very even-handed Democrat.”
" This is why I get angry when people say , ' The South should just splinter ' or some variation of just cutting off ruby states . There are WAY more people in the red states that are n’t rightoid bible thumpers than people give us credit for . We ’re more or less trapped here under the thumb of Republicans who compose themselves into king , and tossing us under the bus puts a huge figure of vulnerable population into imminent risk ( more than we already are ) because many ca n’t afford to ' just move . '
The very idea that picking up and act on a whim to a state with a much high-pitched price of bread and butter is a practicable option is implausibly privileged , especially when you seem at the disparity of average income . "
— luxahoy
7.“QAnon is alive and well around here. They are very vocal about it both in person and online. It’s very common for people to come straight from church and then say the most homophobic, transphobic, or racist thing you’ve ever heard. People here wholeheartedly believe that Trump won the 2020 presidency and believe that everything on CNN is ‘liberal propaganda.'”
8.“I moved to Richmond, Virginia, from Delaware six years ago. I live in a VERY red county, literally one of the leaders of book banning and anti-LGBTQIA legislation nationwide. I was very depressed during 2020 and begged my husband for us to move back to Delaware. But since mortgage rates are through the roof and we are stuck here, I found groups of like-minded people in my town.”
" I helped start a social justice radical for literary entree and got involve in more political movements . It is still VERY difficult to live here as a woman of color , but knowing there are more and more people who do n’t wish the thing that are happen here either serve immensely . "
— n49bb21b12
9.“I am an Independent living in my home state of Florida. My family sailed here from Spain to St. Augustine in the 1700’s. It was a beautiful and carefree upbringing. I was raised to respect different opinions and political views. We had Walter Cronkite, who gave the straightforward news of the day without opinion pieces. Now, in my historical and colorful home state, there is selective hatred from many of my fellow Floridians, hatred directed at anyone with a different opinion or worldview other than their own.”
" I love my state . There are many transplants here , and that is a incentive for Florida . I bid for everyone to enjoy living here but it ’s difficult . Folks are wear down their political relation on their arm and circularise hateful , unkind empty talk . We have serious issues here : rising sea , family 5 hurricanes , overdevelopment , homelessness , and a stressed fresh water supplying .
hear to one another and respect other stand , please . Let ’s focus on our present problems together . "
— Dee , Florida
10.“I’ve lived in Iowa my whole life, 35+ years. We were once a truly purple, almost progressive state, leading the country as one of the first to legalize gay marriage in 2010, topping the education charts, and holding the first presidential caucuses each election cycle. Remember whenPete Buttigiegwon the Iowa caucuses?! Things have taken a turn in the last 10 years or so.”
11.“My family is a very old family of southern Democrats. My Grandfather was a state senator. My family remained Democrats (because it was the right thing to do) when many southern Democrats abandoned the party over Desegregation. We are proud Southerners, and we are fire-breathing Democrats. We live in western North Carolina (Asheville). Asheville dominates the western part of the state and is a breathtakingly beautiful, progressive blue bubble in a red state. There are literally millions upon millions of Democrats and progressives living in North Carolina and in the South, in general. I think most of us see ourselves as putting (and keeping) our money where our mouths are, so to speak.”
" We stay , and we oppose , and we vote here because our votes genuinely matter MORE here than they would if we moved to the West Coast or the Northeast . And , well …. armchair Democrats are a dime bag a 12 in those places .
As I see it , if Democrats really need to make a variety , then they have to move from their comfort zones and get out into the red states to live . Then vote , to make trusted that those states sprain blue . Be sure to invite your friends and families , too . Three red state that could be flipped fairly easy come to mind : North Carolina , Virginia , and Georgia . But only if Democrats make it their mission to move and are prepared to fight for reformist values via the vote box .
Yeah , it can be scary . But it can also be exhilarating . AND it ’s the good thing to do . Fight like blaze and fight for every individual country . Come make our blue bubble large , safer , and stronger . We NEED you guys ! There are an terrible batch of dark words coming out of MAGA ’s backtalk these days . It ’s time to stand up and be count . "
— Stephen , North Carolina
12.“It can feel really unsafe to be a non-Republican in the area of Arizona where I live. Many of my neighbors fly Trump flags and believe the election was stolen. I’m the president of the PTA at my kid’s school and am shocked that fellow parents don’t think their kids should learn about the Civil War, particularly that slavery happened. At all. They want it erased.”
" I was on campus , and another parent prognosticate me a ' liberal degree centigrade * * * ' because I was wear my Eras Tour shirt . It ’s worrisome because these community member fit the bill of the shooter - loving , antiblack , uneducated far - right Republican trope . They openly carry weapons everywhere and have bumper stickers imperil hurt againstJoe Bidenor Liberals , etc .
Even more concerning is the fear that our public shoal are indoctrinating our child with liberal paragon . I have find out quite the opposite ; many parents in the Phoenix Metro area homeschool so that their children are not exposed to facts that they find uncomfortable . Additionally , my cousin has taught his 3 - year - honest-to-goodness daughter to state her Grandpa she ’s mad at him because he voted for Biden . As a public school parent , I have not seen any indoctrination of any form , although when my child was at a public charter schooling , he was force to pray before every meal and bite . It ’s just so hypocritical and absurdly stubborn . "
— Emily , Arizona
13.“I lived in a college town in Alabama for seven years while I was in graduate school, including during the 2016 election and its aftermath. Although I was in a deeply red state, being both at a university and in an academic discipline that tends to be pretty liberal, I felt surrounded by Democrats/progressives. With the exception of the students I taught, I rarely encountered people with whom I disagreed politically (in the classroom, I tried to keep my politics to myself, however). I felt just as blindsided by the results of the 2016 election as people in historically blue states, even though I knew Alabama would go to Trump.”
14.“I live in Arkansas. It’s almost as if you are the only one living in reality, and everyone else is plugged into the Matrix. Republicans(friends and family) treat Trump as if he is the second coming of Jesus, which is blasphemous, but they cannot see the blasphemy because this is being taught in the churches as well.”
" I ’ve seen the expert , true , and decent people I grow up around play into confederacy possibility nutter who discuss the latest Q foretelling at the local coffee bar when once only the weather or local gossip was talked about .
Joe Biden is sing about like he is the Antichrist , and once - sugared footling older grandmas are spewing hate rhetoric about LGBTQ+ somebody that they hear from their local pulpit .
I hear authoritarianism and fascism being embraced in a community that once revere their military parents and grandparent who oppose against the same wickedness back in World War II . It make me sad to see how these the great unwashed have forgotten their values and sacrifices . "
— silkyturtle681
15.“I’ve had no issues at all since moving to central Arkansas a few years ago. Honestly, I think people like to create chaos in their own head for sympathy. My neighbors and coworkers are wonderful. Crime is low in my area. The cost of living is amazing. My community actively supports and replenishes food banks, diaper depots, and social aid. I have bought a gun and furniture at the same store.”
" Seriously , we should work towards stop over this unnecessary divide because question like this only lover the flame and feed the stereotype . "
— Amy , Arkansas
16.“There’s a difficult nuance in being a liberal in a conservative state and still wanting to remain close to my family, both geographically and relationally. It would probably be easier if I were the kind of person who could just cut off my family because we believe different things, especially since we are likely more similar than we both realize. It’s very awkward and disheartening to be at a gathering with my parents and their friend group and hear some of the uninformed, sometimes even hateful, things they say about communities that are different from theirs. I love my parents, and they are genuinely good people, but it’s been challenging to my mental health to feel a responsibility to have conversations with them about my beliefs that almost always just end in yelling and fighting.”
17.“Idaho resident here. I am in high school and have decided that I am not even going to consider dating. As a young woman, the place that could go is just too dangerous. I have had an older friend leave the state after a horrible experience with the abortion laws here. Honestly, I am planning to follow her. For me, it’s off to the East Coast as soon as I can get out of here.”
" I am so done with being a 2d - form citizen . I have not even considered staying here for college . And I have two trans ally who feel the same . None of us plan to stay here a minute longer than we have to . "
— silkyknight81
18.“I live in Utah and am consistently shocked that people around me still think the way they do. Our neighbor casually dropped the ‘n-word’ several times while talking to my husband. I bought a pride flag for our window, and we decided not to put it up for fear that our children would have to deal with the consequences. We sometimes have to tell our children’s friends and even grown adults that blatant racism won’t be tolerated in our home.”
" There are too many example to list , but it really is jarring and sad that so much preconception still exists in 2024 , and no one seems quick to accommodate it . "
— grouchyshark188
19.“I am a blue dot in the red state of Tennessee, and I am disgusted by our state GOP which has taken every opportunity to change laws to their benefit and go directly against the people’s protest and voices by making it easier to obtain guns, refusing to expand healthcare with Medicaid, and refusing to raise the minimum wage.”
20.“We moved to North Carolina over 10 years ago from Portland, Oregon. Charlotte has always been progressive, but we live in a conservative county a little ways outside of Charlotte. At first, I was nervous, being a female POC. But despite our political differences, every single person we’ve met here has been extremely kind and helpful. When I was battling cancer, our conservative neighbors politely demanded to take care of our lawn for us over our objections.”
" No neighbor in our old Portland neighborhood would have stepped up like that and helped out virtual stranger . Overall , it ’s been a swell experience subsist here . Regardless of political affiliation , there are genuinely kind people everywhere , and I truly hope we can see past the politics to each other ’s mankind . "
— Jamie , North Carolina
21.“In Idaho, I don’t feel ‘free’ at all. I’m scared to express any contempt for legislative practices and restrictions on reproductive healthcare for fear of retaliation. Conservatives in Idaho are quick to pull a gun, claiming to be the ‘good guy with a gun’ in literally any instance. There’s now a bar that celebrates Straight Pride.”
" It ’s so awkward . I ’ll never place an American flag at my house because of the correlation between the flag and MAGA . Pretty sad . "
— Amanda , Idaho
22.“Let’s be real: it fucking sucks. It feels as if voting is worthless because your vote will barely make a dent in the conservative block. You feel powerless as those in power continue to take away basic rights and cheat to stay in power. What also really sucks is the reactions from progressives who live in blue states. Anytime there’s any sort of natural disaster or crisis, you’ll see them saying stuff like, ‘Oh well, they deserve it because they’re all just conservative rednecks.'”
23.“I live in Texas, and no one talks about how alone you feel. I have made several friends who have the same beliefs as me, but at the same time, hearing all of the nasty things that I so strongly disagree with out of everyone’s mouth really starts to take a toll on you after a while. You begin to believe that you are the only one who doesn’t think like that, and it truly starts to take a toll on your mental health.”
" As a woman , the policy part of it is just atrocious as well , and I like I could move me and my family out of the state , but it ’s just not possible at this time . Texas necessitate to do better . "
— awkwardsnail85
24.“Another fellow Texan. The feeling of almost hiding what I believe to ensure my physical safety is something I never imagined I’d do. After Robb Elementary, I remember walking outside, trying to just breathe and calm down, and watching a MAGA fan drive past my house with a fully adorned Trump mobile, complete with flags. Don’t they see the absolute destruction going on because of their policies?”
" As for our governor , his callousness towards the immigrant biotic community AND the victims of hitman violence is shocking . "
— s42bb9c35d
25.And finally, “In a lot of ways, it really sucks, but also it’s an important lesson in learning empathy and understanding in a lot of different ways. I grew up upper-middle class in the South and spent a lot of my younger years around people who tended to be pretty conservative. But being Christian, I have a pretty big issue with thinking you can treat someone poorly just because they’re non-Christian, LGBTQIA+, living with a mental illness, neurodivergent, or non-white. So I always leaned more liberal, even if I don’t much care about financial stuff outside of the social policy implications.”
