" Whoever take to ' live ' there will likely wake up in the center of the night with an adult man drub their ear . "
Ah, landlords. If you’ve ever tried to rent, you’ll know that their behaviour can be somewhat…interesting.Sometimes,they try to control how you cook. Other times, they’re very, er,particularabout your love life. And that’s when you’ve managed to rent the property in the first place.
In places that are experiencing ahousing crisisespecially, landlords have been known to requestas much as six month’s rentupfront just for tenants to get their foot in the door. But recently arts writerEloise Hendyspotted a short-term London sublet ad that would make even the most hardened renter scream:
if you did n’t already roll in the hay that the london rental scene is the raging western United States , here is a post publish in the voice of two cats , offer someone the hazard to sleep in a living elbow room . for £ 1000 a monthpic.twitter.com/6fQif4igIB
The ad, shared to the public Facebook groupLondon sublets [short term rent]and room-renting platformSpareRoom, reads: “We are a couple of cats that live in a large one-bedroom ground floor flat with a private garden on a quiet street in a great location with great access. We live with a lovely couple of humans that take care of us, they think the place is theirs, but it’s ours.”
“It’s a very large room with high ceilings, which we cats love to lounge around in,” the cats (??) shared. “There is a comfortable single bed, and the couch can also open into a double. You even have a desk in the corner if you do some work from home. Like we said, the male never uses it, so it is your private space. We only hope you’ll be cool with letting us cats hang out in there if we choose to do so sometimes.” All this, they reveal,will set you back one thousand Great British pounds a Gregorian month.
Understandably, people had thoughts on X. “Never mind the cats, no privacy and no storage of any kind,” one site user wrote.
Never mind the cat , no privacy and no storage of any form
“I need to know everything about ‘the male’: why he willingly chooses to dwell in a kitchen and not a living room and why ‘the female’ isn’t around,” another X user commented.
I need to jazz everything about " the male person " : why he willingly take to populate in a kitchen and not a bread and butter room and why " the female person " is n’t around
“It’s giving his partner has left him and he needs an extra income until the lease runs out in September,” another commenter opined.
It ’s giving his partner has left him and he needs an additional income until the lease runs out in September .
And when one site user decided (for some reason) to argue that the price and conditions were worth it because “it’s a large room and he would have exclusive use of it” (the ad said the man uses it too?), the original poster of the screenshot replied, “Tim, it’s a single mattress in a living room.”
Tim , it ’s a single mattress in a living room
The X post about the listing also reached ther/LondonsubReddit, where it was posted with the caption, “Are London landlords okay?” Responses tothatincluded, “How to subtly tell potential tenants that you intend to murder them in their sleep.”
“Hope you like a couple of landlords lounging in your bedroom. Based upon landlords always being worse than they say, they will live in the bedroom that they will still call a living room and demand a fortune for their pleasure,“another wrote(correctly, I fear).
“That is 100% still a functioning living room and the people living there will definitely still be expecting to use it. It’s likely to start off with a request for a shared ‘flat movie night’ and then ‘people are coming over, could you tidy up your bed’, to passive-aggressive ‘I just opened the windows because it’s getting a bit stuffy yeah?’“said a commenter.
“There are dozens of red flags in that post to the point that whoever chooses to ‘live’ there will probably wake up in the middle of the night with an adult human licking their ear lobe while purring…“a Redditor added.
“Very strange and very creepy so very normal for our local landlords. This city, you know? Sometimes, I don’t,“someone else commented.
